Thursday, 22 September 2011

Just a little update,

which was supposed to be written last night, but the internet decided to fail again. It seems to happen mostly when the wind picks up, and there's been a lot of wind recently.

But anyway, after a bit of nagging and emotional bribery (not blackmail this time - I'm getting better), my parents have allowed me to go clubbing on saturday - yippee! My Dad's going to give me a lift into town and get some shopping once I've met my friends. I'll have to watch Doctor Who on i-player. We would record it, but the recorder's been acting weird ever since the switch-over, and we're not buying a new one because my parents prefer to save as much money as possible. (Honestly, are they expecting a meteor to hit the house?)

I've listened to Invaders Must Die now. I enjoyed listening to it, but it's not made it onto my favourites yet. I danced with Pete some of the time; he likes it too, but a little less than I do. Susan didn't enjoy it at all, and Liam ran for the hills as soon as the guitar came in on the first track. Poor thing, I could hear him trying to bury himself under his blanket.

I think I'll treat it like I do my small collection of classical music. It's nice background music, but I won't miss it if it isn't played for a while.

Something funny happened in English today. We were working on our folio pieces when the door opened and a green parakeet flew in. It flew around the classroom a couple of times, stole a hat that I didn't even know I was wearing, and flew out again, the door slamming shut behind it. I've not told anyone about it (except for you guys), and I usually keep these things to myself, but I realised this blog was portraying a picture of me with very regular characters as my hallucinations. That's not the truth. Yeah, Pete hangs out with me on a mostly daily basis, and Susan is pretty hard to get rid of (especially since she's started appearing more often), and Liam's pretty much a constant, but there are a lot of hallucinations that I don't talk about. Some of them hang out with me for a few days then leave. Some of them only last a few seconds, like that parakeet earlier. Some of them are more permanent, but don't stay long when they do appear (Brainy Smurf is the most common of these, and by far the most annoying).

Nowadays I can usually tell if something's real or not by looking at the people around me and judging by their reactions if they can see it too. Sometimes it's more difficult, though. If nobody's there, or if they're distracted by something else, then I have to judge it by circumstance. Luckily this has never happened to me, but one of my biggest fears is that I'll start talking to someone in public, and everybody else sees me talking to thin air.

Anyway, I don't know how this post got so long, but if I don't stop now I'll keep on rambling. Ciao for now, dudes!


  1. Hi Barb- I wish I would have looked at your blog sooner.

    I've read over your writing about your hallucinations, your alter-egos, your friends...I think we have the same case of "teh crazies." On my own blog, I haven't much elaborated on my "voices" because I don't talk about them to people, but they fit the same archetypes as Susan, Pete, and Liam. And Brainy Smurf, too, even. You'll have to excuse me because I'm shocked to realize that I'm not the only one like us in the world.

    I'm a complete lame for this, you want to be friends? =D 'Cause birds of a feather flock together, and crazy-ass birds have more fun. And when times get tough...well, it's always good to know you're not alone. =)

  2. Yes. Definitely! :)
    And to be honest, I thought much the same things when I started reading your blog. I'm sorry it took so long for me to reply. Everything's explained in my next post.

    One thing, though. You seem so content with yourself. Sometimes I wish I was normal, that I could connect with people, like the way you've done. Sometimes I want the hallucinations to go away. But then I see a friendly face and I know I would never want to give them up.

    I've forgotten where I'm going with this. I'll maybe try again tomorrow. Goodnight!